Miss Marmalade’s is a cafe with a quirky retro-inspired interior so there is certainly no shortage of things to gawk at as you gobble down some brunch or a weird milkshake.

Furniture is junk yard chic with lots of bibelots, trinkets, knick-knacks, bunting, old bottles, tea-pots and vintage radios. Curios in containers, old sewing machines, board games, randomly placed bowler hats and a skeleton. Imagine Steptoe’s living room with cake. Far more interesting though that the ennui induced from some of the local cafes I could mention.

The staff are bustling and friendly though I’ve heard occasionally brusque. I was ushered into the most ‘business friendly’ table (I hoped for a large table to spread out and work on) but they sat me at a small flimsy piece of wood.

This place is compact; downstairs only really five tables and a tiny low sider near a small sofa in the window – quirky but a waste of space. Upstairs has a few more tables (more of an overflow really as no one seems to bother) and it’s not exactly accessible as a disabled person user would need a cherry picker to get up there.

The menu is limited and not cheap but food is generally good and they have a few GF options. The wacky named items on the menu cannot disguise the fact that it only really sells soup, sandwiches and colossal ice-cream sundaes containing 35,000 calories.

Even more wacky were some of the fellow diners. A man eating soup with such vigour I thought he was trying to slurp down Lake Windermere. Another woman near him was talking about how her pet ferret had managed to get into her knickers (or was it her knicker draw)? I don’t know because I was distracted by an enormous hairy mole on her forehead and the odour from her husband which I would describe as eau de skunk. Once Moley and Pepe le Pew had gone I could then start concentrate on my work.

There was background music and atmos was fine but it is usually fairly busy due to the footfall of Pillory Street. Overall a decent and interesting place to be in, if you can get in and if you do, best if you are thin.


Verdict: 3.5 /5


Quirky, food


Cramped, limited menu